I’m not saying that I’m an amazing actor but i HAVE won as many Oscars as Leonardo DiCaprio
let’s be honest we’re all just reblogging that as long as we still can
REBLOG WHILE YOU STILL CAN
(Source: punsatisfying, via my-favouriteisgouda)
the fact that ellen doesn’t have to insult celebrities to be funny makes her 500% more amazing then she already is
did u guys see me at the oscars
You looked great, pizza. Congrats on everything. I love you.
Thanks, John. I love you too.
if i was a ghost id help little kids with math and throw vases at mean people
how the fuck does a ghost help people with math whatchu gonna boo at the kid till they can count to 23???? it doesnt work like that. reevaluate your life please
somebody isnt getting help with their math when im a ghost
*starts crying* i just really like mashed potatoes
shout out to Leo for not initiating mass murder right then and there
i swear to god I’m such a low maintenance friend like you could have not spoken to me for months and ill still be like yEAH FRIEND HI
(Source: ivemoved666, via spookygrownup)
Do the birds and bees ever hang out or do they just fuck every time?
remember when lil wayne said “real g’s move in silence like lasagna”
that shit fucked me up
and then i realized the “g” in “lasagna” is silent
i was like “damn……”
that man never got the deserved credit for that genius line.